did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Such a big mess for such a small penis
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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