Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
