She's JV to your varsity
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
