I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
