so explain again why im purple
no
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
