tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
