what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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