Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize
