you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I believe in your delicious
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
