this beer tastes like vomit already
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
