Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
