Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
