I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
