you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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