its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize