either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Did you just see the Batmobile???
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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