I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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