new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
