omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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