Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
