My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize