ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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