He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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