I love black thongs
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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