Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize