I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
no more duck duck goose at the bar
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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