we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize