no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
