Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
