i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize