My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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