it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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