since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
