I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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