Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
