what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
