what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
