this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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