Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
