So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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