that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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