I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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