Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize