In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I think im going to throw up on grandma
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
