I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
