So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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