I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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