I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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