By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
