last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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