so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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